Who in the hell goes to the playground at 7:00 AM ???

When my wife and I moved to West Hollywood several lifetimes ago (actually 7 years), we lived on Martel Ave, two blocks North of Melrose and two blocks South of Santa Monica Blvd - Right near Fat Burger.

Great location, great building, and even a famous person or two (Sasha Mitchell of TV's Step by Step lived right below us on the 2nd floor)

Goofy cousin Cody was in unit 209

And outside our 3rd floor balcony was Poinsettia Park with its ball fields, tennis courts, and its playground. It was perfect - Or so we thought.

The very first weekend in our new home, we were awoken just past 7:00 AM to the shrieks of six year-old girls, the shouting of seven year-old boys and the crying of 20+ toddlers - It was awful.

"Who the hell goes to the playground at 7:00 AM," I asked my new bride. "What's the matter with these people? Don't they know this is a Saturday and some people (namely me and probably TV's Sasha Mitchell) need to get some sleep?"

For years this bugged me - Both the actual noise and the question of why in the world ANYONE would go to a playground that early.

Fast forward to this morning. My 2 1/2 year-old son wakes up at 5 AM. And of course if he's up, I'm up. We watch Sesame Street, we play with blocks, and we eat breakfast. Now it's 6:45 and I have NO FREAKIN' IDEA what to do...

Aaah!!!!! There's always the plaground! So I get him out of his pajamas, throw him in the car (proverbially, of course) and head over to the new Shane's Inspiration playground at Lake Balboa.

Upon arrival, I see at least 2 dozen other zombified parents, half-heartedly chasing their kids around. Forget churros, frozen mangos and inflatable animals - Somebody should start selling coffees and Diet Cokes beside the swingset - He'd make a killing.

So, the back to my initial question. The answer is: ME.

I, and other frustrated parents who are at their wits end with their early rising spawn, take their kids to the playground at 7:00 AM.

Needless to say the little punk fell asleep in the car on the way home and is now resting peacefully.

Me??? I'm exhausted, yet simultaneously jacked up a 64 ounce, Super Big Gulp, Diet Coke.

This is the playround - Minus exhausted parents and annoying kids.